Jokes.

A place for some light-hearted chat.
niemeyjt
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Re: Jokes.

Post by niemeyjt »

Isn't there an argument that there is a Stuart Pretender who should be any future King of Scotland?

Edit - maybe https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franz,_Duke_of_Bavaria

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AIIy
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Re: Jokes.

Post by AIIy »

Only if someone disagrees with you.
Being funny makes you more attractive.
Beauty fades but sarcasm lives forever.

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ANOther
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Re: Jokes.

Post by ANOther »

bond.jpg
Brexit: ‘taking back’ what we had never lost in order to lose everything we had...

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AIIy
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Re: Jokes.

Post by AIIy »

A guy takes his young daughter with him when he goes to get his hair cut. As he sits in the chair, she stands beside him eating a cake. The barber says, "Sweetheart, you're going to get hair on your muffin."
"Yeth, I know.", she answers, "and I'm going to get boobeeth too."
Being funny makes you more attractive.
Beauty fades but sarcasm lives forever.

niemeyjt
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Re: Jokes.

Post by niemeyjt »

footie.jpeg

ajm
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Re: Jokes.

Post by ajm »

Guy goes into a pub, walks up to the bar and orders a pint of orange cordial.
Barman says to him this is pub why the cordial?
Guy says" if you had what I have you would order the same"
Barman " What's that?"
Guy " 60p"
"If I had known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself."Mae West.

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AIIy
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Re: Jokes.

Post by AIIy »

Scottish pain scale

1. Again!
2. Oyah!
3. Oyah bassa!
4. Oyah fuhin bassa!
5. Not for family viewing.
Being funny makes you more attractive.
Beauty fades but sarcasm lives forever.

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Bald Eagle
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Re: Jokes.

Post by Bald Eagle »

Roger, age 80, always wanted a pair of authentic Texas cowboy boots.
So, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home.
Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, "
Notice anything different about me?"
Margaret, age 75, looked him over. "Nope."
Frustrated, Roger stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots. Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different now?
Margaret looked up and said in her best deadpan, "Roger, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow."
Furious, Roger yelled, "And do you know why it's hanging down, Margaret?"
"Nope. Not a clue", she replied.
"It's hanging down, because it's looking at my new boots!!!!"
Without missing a beat Margaret replied, "Should have bought a hat, Roger! Should have bought a hat."
“Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.”

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AIIy
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Re: Jokes.

Post by AIIy »

**** FOR SALE ****
...Sweet Chariot...
Low Swung Model

...Call Mr Jones...
Being funny makes you more attractive.
Beauty fades but sarcasm lives forever.

niemeyjt
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Re: Jokes.

Post by niemeyjt »

chris.jpeg

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